Greetings! I’m writing from my hotel room in San Francisco, and I’m so pleased to see all of the great ideas and questions you have posed! Look for my reply to your comments.

Today our focus is on the introduction and specifically the idea of “orienting the reader,” which means telling the reader what you hope to accomplish with your essay. In the United States, we often write objectively, yet internationally it is more common to write (at least for part of the essay) from the first person point of view. We are writing to an international reader, so let’s adhere to international standards.

Introduction Paragraph:

1. Identify the author, novel, and central conflict. Be sure to italicize the novel’s title.

2. Identify the central question your essay hopes to answer.

3. Explain the approach you will take in your essay and why you believe that this approach will best satisfy your central question.

4. Share a brief or abbreviated answer to your central question. (This is your thesis statement!) If you don’t have your thesis statement at this time, it’s okay. You can return later and insert it here in your introduction.

Body Paragraphs:

1. Provide the answer to one of your supporting questions (you worked on these yesterday)

2. Develop support of your interpretation with specific references to the text. Remember to write with your book open and cite examples. Provide the context (who, what, when, where, why) PRIOR to your concrete detail. You need to guide the reader to your example.

3. Comment on your example (1-2 sentences)

4. Comment on Murakami’s choices (1-2 sentences)

5. Repeat steps 2-4 as necessary. You should have a balance of context, concrete detail, commentary, and author commentary in your essay.

Exemplary Essay

If you haven’t already, I strongly encourage you to read Nick Peters’ essay, which scored a perfect score from the IB examiner. You’ll have a good sense of what you’ll need to to do. Keep your voice academic and sustain your interpretation.

I’m so glad to know that you having success with starting your essays! What a relief!

Kind Regards,

Mr. Coey

Greetings IB Juniors:

You have recently completed your supervised writing of your Murakami essay. Congratulations! Remember to develop your essay from your supervised writing; the IB organization wants to deter plagiarism and promote academic honesty. DO NOT, under any circumstance, copy any sentences, paragraphs, or entire essays from any online essays. IF YOU do this, you are cheating and you will earn a failing mark for the assignment and be referred to the principal and IB coordinator. I only mention this, not for the majority of you, but for the minority. Sadly, there have been two recent examples of such plagiarism. Overall, however, I am very pleased with your creativity and your perseverance. Great ideas!

Outlining Your Essay:

In the past, I have asked students to outline with topics and supporting examples. For this essay, however, I would like you to instead use questions as the guiding ideas for your essay. For example, let’s say my essay topic is “darkness in Murakami’s novel, The Wind Up Bird Chronicle.” I might outline my essay with the following questions:

1. What role does ‘darkness’ play in Toru’s search for the truth?
2. How does Murakami use the image of darkness to create tension and ambiguity?
3. How does the ‘darkness’ associated with the woman in Room 208 relate to not only Toru’s search but also his state-of-mind?
4. What role does ‘darkness’ play in Kumiko’s life?
5. Why does Murakami include this motif? How might it be related to the novel’s themes?

You can see that from these questions, I will generate several answers, and these answers will become my topic sentences for the development of my paragraphs and my essay. Think of your topic sentences as mini-thesis statements (Topic, opinion, and support). If you approach the outline and development of your essay this way, I am certain that you will have a well-developed and well-organized essay, which is ONE of the CRITERIA you will need to address.

1. Respond to this post with 4 or more questions about your essay topic. They need to be good questions, related to literary concepts/aspects of the novel as a genre. Two of the questions should mention Murakami by name. Remember, this is an essay about the author’s choices, namely Murakami’s choices.
2. Click on the “comments” at the bottom of this post and submit your questions. We can comment on each other’s questions and provide suggestions or feedback as necessary.
3. Due Monday, March 7
4. After submitting these questions, please begin developing your essay, and use these questions to organize and develop your essay!

Kind Regards,

Mr. Coey

Dear IB Juniors,

We just completed our first round of interactive oral presentations! The presenters did a great job explaining their concepts, providing examples, and then drawing us into the conversation so that we left with a renewed appreciation of the historical, philosophical, biographical and psychological contexts! Click here for the Interactive Oral Presentation Topics

Thank you so much!

It’s difficult for me to ask more of you, especially when you are all already working so hard. Still, this IB English course requires that we write a 300-400 word “Reflective Statement” after the “Interactive Oral Presentations.” (By the way, if you would like to see a sample “reflective statement,” click on “Nick Peters SOW Essay” on the page titled “IB Exemplary Essays.” His essay received the highest mark possible from an IB examiner)

I know you are all hard-working and very capable, however. So, I expect great thinking on this important writing assignment!

Use the following questions to help you develop a personal reflection and please do not go over the word count:

Because of the “Interactive Oral Presentations,” which concepts or ideas do you now understand? Select only one or two concepts to write about. (topic sentence)

Which specific examples from the novel can you relate to this idea? Explain in several sentences of commentary how this scene/moment/passage exemplifies the concept. (Concrete detail and commentary here)

 Explain the author’s role in addressing this concept. Which choices specifically does Murakami make to influence how we think about this concept. (commentary on the writer’s choices)

 Which questions about Murakami are you left with as a reader because of your participation in the “Interactive Oral Presentations”?

 Word count: 300-400 words

Due: Monday, February 15th at 7 p.m.

1. Type your reflection into a word document or cloud storage. Save. Then, read aloud and proofread.
2. Upload it to this website by clicking on the “comment” link at the bottom of THIS POST.
3. You will not see your reflection post immediately. First, I will need to approve your comment. Once I approve your comment, you will see your reflective statement on this website.

Our reading schedule should allow for us to read The Wind Up Bird Chronicle: Book Two, chapters 1-6, up to page 229. Please maintain the good habit of reading nightly and taking notes or making observations as you read. You’ll need those quotes in three weeks!

Kind Regards,

Mr. Coey

Seniors!!!

Would you like to see a scored Paper 1 essay? Well, good news. I have this Paper One Standard Level essay for you to consider. Unlike our Higher Level Literature course, this Standard Level exam provides two guiding questions. You will see those questions at the top of the typed response. Give it a read and notice the following:

• the writer’s use of evidence from the passage (lots of concrete details!)
• commentary on the writer’s choices and techniques
• use of the writer’s name in several paragraphs
• an evaluation of the effects of those choices
• “foil”, narrative voice, word choice, and tone (literary concepts)

The essay scored a 17/20, which is a very high score. Please consider reviewing these Paper 1 Standard Level Examiner Comments for the sample essay. Download the Paper 1 Rubric here..

Please keep in mind that Monday’s Paper One exam assesses your ability to:

• show  understanding of either the prose passage or poem through well-supported interpretation
• identify language usage, structure, style, and technique employed by the author
• discuss the effects that arise for the author’s choices
• present your ideas in a formally organized and coherently developed piece of writing

For more information about how to approach writing a literary commentary, please refer to this document, which we discussed in class: What is literary commentary

If you would like to review ADDITIONAL EXAMPLES OF PAPER ONE AND PAPER TWO EXAMS CLICK HERE.

I look forward to seeing you bright and early Monday morning at 7:30 a.m. in front of room J1.

Kind Regards,

Mr. Coey

p.s. If you need to brush up on your idioms, metaphors, and litotes, be sure to check out this resource @ http://literarydevices.net/

p.p.s Should the need arise, please contact me at jccoey@gmail.com or by phone 916-284-7673

Written Assignment Cover Sheet : Please fill in the fields for your name, candidate number, check the work you are writing about, essay word count, reflection word count, essay title. Print! You will sign. Then, I will review and sign! (If you get a “plug-in error,” just click the “always allow” pdf icon in the upper right. It should open.)

You may review the Rubric for World Literature Essay so that you know exactly how the examiner will score your essay.

The prompt for the Reflective Statement is as follows:
“How was your understanding of the cultural and the contextual considerations of the work developed through the interactive oral?”

You may copy this into your reflective statement, and paste it just above your typed response.

Reflective Statement: (300-400 words)

Written Assignment: (1,200-1,500 words)

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Below are examples of how to properly provide in-text citations and a works cited page.

Look at these examples! It’s quite easy actually when you are…

Citing Drama

This would be ‘germane’ to your typed Antigone essay. Be sure to include a works cited page with the proper citation for your essay:

Sophocles. The Oedipus Cycle: An English Version. Trans. Dudley Fitts and Robert Fitzgerald.   San Diego: Harcourt, Brace, 1977. Print.

Kafka, Franz. “Letter to His Father.” Trans. Ernest Kaiser and Eithene Wilkins. Legacies: Fiction, Poetry, Drama, Nonfiction. Fort Worth: Harcourt Brace, 1995. 322-28. Print.

Kafka, Franz. “The Metamorphosis.” The Complete Stories. New York: Schocken, 1988. 89-139. Print.

Ninh, Bảo. The Sorrow of War: A Novel of North Vietnam. Ed. Frank Palmos. Trans. Phan T. Hao. New York: Riverhead, 1996. Print.

Hey Seniors!

Here are some great sample essays and other resources for your consideration:

Four essays written as part of the college-application process reveal students and their families going through tough economic times — and emerging stronger.

The winners of the SN&R’s 2014 College Essay Contest

UC Personal Statement Presentation

Personal Statement Unit

Common pitfalls to writing a personal statement

Greetings all,

Below are examples of high-scoring IB English essays.

Score of 23/25

engalit_hl_sample9  

Enlish HL sample 9 examiner comments

Score of 22/25

engalit_hl_sample10_en

English HL sample 10 examiner comments

Score of 18/25

engalit_hl_sample12_en

English HL sample 12 examiner comments

Remember to write strongly focused topic sentences, and in each paragraph discuss the writer’s choices and the extent to which you appreciate those choices. If you discuss Kafka’s choices throughout your essay (perhaps 2-5 times each body paragraph) you will likely improve your evaluation of “The Metamorphosis” as a work of art.

Thank you for all of your hard work.

Kind Regards,

Mr. Coey

p.s. Spring Break is almost here!

Dear students,

This Tuesday you will participate in California State University’s EAP, which allows you to show the university that you are a critical reader, capable of writing a focused thesis statement with supporting examples and reasons. I will administer the assessment and you will have 45 minutes to complete the writing task.

Monday, you will see a sample essay and practice responding to the writing prompts. Basically, the prompts are all the same: you must explain both sides of an argument, you must take a position (generally acknowledging both sides but choosing one side over the other), and you must provide examples from your observations, experiences, or readings. Pretty simple actually.

Here is why you want to do well: if for any reason you do not receive high marks for your IB assessment, you will need to take English 1A, composition, as a freshman in college. But before you can enroll in that class, you will need to show proficiency. This assessment allows you to do that. Trust me, you want to do well on the EAP.

Sadly, I will not be with you tomorrow. A family emergency came up and my wife needs my help tomorrow. I’m sure you understand.

Please look over these resources, especially the first few slides of the power point titled, “EAP Prep”.

EAP Prep

EAP Rubric

EPT Sample prompts & essays

Be well, and I’ll see you Tuesday.

Warm Wishes,

Mr. Coey

Dear IB English students,

You continue to impress me with your creative ideas and commendable work ethos. You take risks while remaining true to your academic principles. You are growing as critical thinkers and writers.

Due Wednesday, March 5th is the following:

Reflective Statement of 300-400 words.

Sorrow of War essay of 1200-1500 words*.

*nearly all of the exemplary essays I have reviewed have used the words available.

Click below to access a sample essay with examiner’s comments.

Exemplary Essay and Reflective Statement

(Extra-credit awarded if by Monday you can tell me how many times the author’s name, Mulisch, is used in the sample ‘exemplary essay’ from above)

Enlish HL sample 9 examiner comments

Rubric for World Literature Essay

Given my experience with these essays, in addition, I ask you to keep the following in mind:

1. Write with your novel open and in front of you. So many errors in reasoning or citing can be easily avoided if you write with your novel open and refer to the text as you develop your essay.

2. Proofread for ‘dead words’ and active voice verbs. For a list of awesome verbs to use in an essay try this list of Verbs for Literary Essays.

3. Ask yourself if your topic sentences are ‘mini-thesis statements’. Do your topic sentences relate to your thesis?

4. Where in your essay are you discussing Bao Ninh’s choices? Some writers choose to write about Ninh in each body paragraph, while others reserve that discussion for the conclusion of the essay. Either way, you MUST discuss his choices as they relate to your topic. Be sure to answer the questions ‘why?’ and ‘how?’

5. Relax. Yes you may just write the greatest essay of your life over the next five days, but it is possible it will take much longer. Have a growth mindset! And, above all else, remember you are already awesome.

Dear seniors,

These two opportunities recently came to my attention, and I think that both of them are fantastic opportunities for you.

Announcement of 2013 High School Scholarship Essay Contest
Open to High School Seniors in Sacramento and Surrounding Counties
Total Scholarship Awards $15,000

Sponsored by the Sacramento Chapter of Physicians for Social Responsibility

Note: Deadline for entry is midnight on Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Essay Topic

• Students may enter the 2013 PSR/Sacramento Scholarship Essay Contest by submitting an original essay of 500 words or fewer describing their thoughts about the following position statement of the American Academy of Pediatrics Committee on Injury and Poison Prevention, published in the April 2000 issue of the journal, Pediatrics: “Firearm regulations, to include bans of handguns and assault weapons, are the most effective way to reduce firearm related injuries.”
• The full text of the April 2000 article, “Firearm-related injuries affecting the Pediatric Population,” and an updated article of the same title, published in October of 2012 are available on the PSR/Sacramento website at www.sacpsr.org.

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Youth Ambassadors Trip to China

Hi All,

I’m happy to announce that JSSCC will continue to organize our annual Youth Ambassador trip to China this summer.  Like last year, we’ll also offer one full scholarship (all expense paid, $2000+) and another $1000 scholarship to select students.  All participants will enjoy 5 days of free stay in Jinan through our arrangement with Jinan.  Please see the attached application packet.  Deadline to apply: 2/28/2013.

Please help spread the word.  For any questions, please contact Gloria at 685.8049.

Regards,

______________________________________________________________

Grace Liu

President, Jinan-Sacramento Sister Cities Corporation (JSSCC)

Promoting Friendship since 1984

www.jsscc.org

1017 L St, #1160, Sacramento, CA 95814